The Angels say, “Write a blog post.”

So, I’m doing my thing today, when I heard, “Write a blog post.” I of course come back with, “About what, guys?” Needless to say, I have no idea what this post is about.

I’ve been reading a book called I Hope I Screw This Up by Kyle Cease. It has caused all kinds of life-changing revelations in there. One of which is–love every fear. Anytime something arises that we are punishing, in resistance to, or ignoring, we hold that in place. If we love the fear, “come here, fear, I love you no matter what” it suddenly stops all the nonsense the fear is trying to create.

It’s been interesting lately. I have these two sides (like all of us do) where I feel super empowered (like superman!) and it feels everything is going good, then the other side gets all whiny.

I’m a law of attraction girl, but it seems my mind wants to control it all. It wants to MAKE stuff happen, and I know that’s not the way it works, yet the mind still wants to do it. It’s quite annoying. I’ve been listening to Abraham Hicks for quite a while now, and thankfully when my minds get all whacko I start with a stream of better-feeling thoughts.

I get jealous. I get whiny. I feel like it’s all super hard.

That part of  me I still resist. I want to be positive, do my dream, help people with my heart-felt books, products etc… I know what I have to say is valuable, but then of course the other part of me says, this is a waste of time. No one cares. 

Ugh. Why do we have to fight that shit? I even wrote a book called Your Voice Your Choice, and it literally addresses those thoughts. I go through this type of thinking, maybe you can relate. There are so many people doing what I want to do. There isn’t enough customers, and why would they pick me? 

Maybe the angels just wanted me to write this shitty thinking to get it out in the open. I love writing, and it’s like something in me thinks I can’t have what I love. Dang, that’s the problem right there. 

I keep feeling overwhelmed lately, and when I feel it, I just want to go to sleep. I don’t know what’s the deal. I will go strong for a while, then want to hide under the covers from the world. I see people who constantly struggle, and it gets to me too. I know there is enough out there for all of us, I know it with my inner being, but its the other side that fights it all.

Maybe this post is just for me, guys. Maybe I needed to express my frustration with myself about being overwhelmed, annoyed that nothing seems to be easily working, and that my dream seems so challenging to continue. I wish money was just non-existent. I know focusing on lack of sales, customers, followers etc…only brings more of the same thoughts and experiences. The thing is–how do you move beyond that?

Does anyone actually have the answers out there?

I feel I’ve been searching for the answers forever. Maybe it’s because I AM THE ANSWER. Heard that before? Yeah, me too. I know we have this huge, inner being, and this huge inner wisdom. We can tap into all of it, but we are still human too. We have to work with the ego part of us that’s always freaking the f** out about it all.

Anyways, if you can relate with this–hang in there! We are all on this path of uncovering a deeper side of ourselves. I get overwhelmed with the amount of info, and I just want something to truly stick inside of me and make more sense.

Maybe together we can figure this shit out.

 

 

 

God, I Want to Help People!

For a while now, I have been having this burning feeling inside of me. It’s a mixture of emotions I couldn’t quite explain. As I sat at my desk tonight, I pulled from two separate angel card decks. In both decks I got a similar card: laughter. I sat back for a moment and watched some YouTube videos that made me laugh.

I felt this urge to look up Kyle Cease. I’d stumbled upon him through Facebook a while back, and instantly his stuff made me cry and laugh–sometimes together!

As I watched this amazing transformation happen with this lady, I started to cry myself. I had no idea why I was crying, until suddenly it came out of my mouth in a desperate way, “God I want to help people!” Right now instant tears  are springing to my eyes, because it’s this aching desire that I feel.

I see hurting people every day, and my heart aches and hurts with them. I want to fix it. I want to fix all of it. I know I can’t fix every wound, every problem, and help everyone out there. I get overwhelmed by the immense sorrow and struggle everyone seems to face.

Why does it seem so many are unhappy?

As an empath, my heart is to heal everyone. I keep telling myself, “You can’t fix them. They have to choose to fix themselves.” And in reality, we’re not broken. We just keep getting attached to the mess.

Our true essence is beautiful.

My words feel like a struggle–I know they are meant to roar in the atmosphere and shatter depression and change lives around me. I know it deep in the pit of who I am. As an author I push my books out there, but don’t seem to see much impact.

Then my heart breaks and aches, because I want my stuff to help heal the broken, wounded, and lost souls around me.

Then I watch Kyle, and I realize–I need to be okay with it all. I need to be okay with my pain and struggle of wanting to be heard. I need to say, “I want to help people and feel limited, and I love that.” He talks a lot about loving where we’re at, and embracing the moment. When we love even our “mess” we make space for the answer to push through.

When we push against something, all we see is what we’re pushing against. We block opportunities. When I hear about sorrow my inner being shouts, “Help them!” I know deep within me, my voice is going to shake the nations. But, I feel weak. Insecure. Not sure if anyone cares.

I know I can’t be Kyle Cease. I have to be me.

I know that I have a message of love–connection–and empowering people. I know buried in me is the voice of a warrior princess–who is brave, true to herself, and proclaims healing to all.

In my new book (still to be released)–all my guts hang out. It’s been a work in progress, because each chapter I write, I find this new side of me peeking from the shadows saying, “Let me out!”

This world is not going to hell. This world is full of light. We are light and love. We are an essence of Source and the Universe, and God Himself. We are stardust and light. We are souls of great power and beauty.

Shine, beauties. 

Overcoming my own negative voice is the first step to showing you your voice of power too.

I feel stuck at the bottom. Not sure how to get to the top of the mountain to be heard. I don’t know how to share the message of healing, love, and light to everyone.

It reminds me of the show I’m watching: Merlin. Here Merlin is the greatest sorcerer of all time, and he doesn’t even know it. He can’t even openly show his power for fear of what will happen.

We all hold this endless power inside of us–we are literally the Universe itself in a manifested physical form–and we think that’s weak?

We hold it all inside of us. Every particle is packed full of energy that can shape worlds.

The ache is there–but expressing myself every day makes the ache a little less. Maybe this will help you today. Maybe it was just for me.

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3d wealth cover

 

Depression is a Beast

I feel depressed today.

It’s on and off, but it’s like a beast feeding on me. Sucking the life out of my motivation, creativity, and heart.

I feel voiceless today.

Like the things I do, write, express, and feel are pointless. I wonder why my soul chose this f*cking planet at times. It’s dense. Heavy. Sad.

I hear my own self say, “You can do this. Your voice matters. Your creativity matters.” And then the beast comes back to tell me, “But, no one follows you, likes you, or reads your stuff. You can’t express in your relationships.”

The beast is ugly and brutal. He feeds on my fears and amps them till its a noise I can’t escape.

My relationships mirror my beast. They mirror, “Don’t express yourself, you’re wrong. Don’t speak up for yourself. Don’t tell the world your feelings, because you’re not going to be heard.”

The Beast is brutal.

Just writing this out, makes me feel I’m pushing the beast back. I’ve lived with him before. He eats at me. He hurts me. He tells me I’m unlovable, unworthy, and voiceless. I shout at him, and he drowns out my voice with his.

But, the beast is only as big as I let him be. 

I want to express in my relationships and feel free to be myself. I will not let the beast push me back into my past. I will not be a voiceless wife who couldn’t express her pain to the world. I will not be that girl.

I will f*cking slay this mother f*ucking beast. I don’t care how. 

I am a voice. I am a valuable soul. I don’t give a sh*t if my stuff is ignored. I hear it. I am the one who should be hearing it the loudest.

I am now the beast. I can hear her roar. She’s so strong and courageous and full of power. She is a roaring waterfall, drowning out the noise of the first beast. She’s beautiful, a warrior, an Atlantian Princess.

You are too.

F*cking slay your beast.

Don’t let him control you.

Be the voice that shuts up that f*cking thing.

You are the only one who can.

hand for help on the mountain

 

You are Needed

This World Needs Your Voice

Ripped piece of paper on grunge paper background. Love letter
I received this message this morning from a Facebook Friend, “Your voice matters.. never be afraid to use it.. someone will need to hear your perspective.”
 
At first I thought, “Awe, that was nice.” Then it sparked something.
 
Someone will need to hear your perspective.
 
That got me thinking about all the authors, teachers, and Youtubers, who’ve helped me heal, awaken, and overcome some huge obstacles. What if they hadn’t used their voice?What if they’d listened to the doubts, fears, and blah-blah you can’t do it voice inside of their heads? They all started somewhere.
 
I would have never got the help I needed. I would have never seen the perspective I needed at that time in my life.
 
Everyone has a unique perspective. It doesn’t matter who you are–you will not look at the world the same as everyone else.
 
You can either let that make you feel alone or completely alive. My world is unique to me. I’m creating it by energy and intention. It’s exciting to create something beautiful each day in my life. Relationships, creativity, beautiful thoughts, and more. All of it is my creation–and those who need my perspective will be drawn to it.
 
My number one goal with my new book is: Give people back their power.
 
I want to help awaken others to who they are, and breathe life into their visions and dreams.
 
Your perspective IS needed.
People will be drawn to your service.
Be the beautiful you that you are–and be it with joy.
Your world is unique to you–create with joy.
#perspective #perception #emotions #youareneeded #shinebeautiful #loveothers #loveyourself

Who are YOU Impacting? 3 Tips for Success

 

Who are you impacting?

boom

As a kid did you pick up a dandelion and blow its seeds all over? There was something about watching those little puff balls dance on the wind that just felt GOOD.

We ALL have seeds inside of us.

blow your seeds

My mom recently preached a sermon about this very thing. One tiny act of reaching out to a bum on the street, completely changed his life and his entire family.

I’m not that important. 

Why should I try? There are people better than me.

I’m not good enough. 

Have you ever heard this type of stuff in your head?

I know I HAVE.

What the hell is success anyway? Is it a number? Is it a dollar amount? Is it how  many friends you have? Everyone’s view of success varies.

I’ve had times where I got broadsided about the way I did my gifting. It knocked me back, discouraged me, and made me want to give it all up. But, it’s amazing how ONE person can get you back on your feet.

one touch

YOUR SEEDS ARE VALUABLE.

Does every seed grow? No. Does everything work out 100% perfect? No. But, the more seeds you get out there, the more you have impact on the lives around you.

3 Tips for Success

TIP 1.

Get out there

No matter how little it seems, spread those beautiful seeds of love to all you meet. Write that book. Paint that painting. Dance that dance. Bake that pie. All of it matters.

TIP 2.

Trust

We have NO clue what our tiny seed could do. I’ve had people come up to me and tell me how impacting my Facebook post was on their life–and I thought it was pointless.

TIP 3.

Receive

I know these are super simple tips, but honestly, if you can get this, you’ll feel inspired. Open your arms, your heart, and your soul and just say, “I receive.”

Here’s a quote from my book: Your Voice Your Choice

No dream is ever dead. No gift is ever without breath. No voice is ever without sound. Sometimes all it takes is a little light to get it going again.

If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe to my blog, youtube channel, instagram, or facebook  for more information about anxiety, depression, divorce healing, and spirituality. 

 

 

How to Declutter: Creating Space Within #declutter

SPACE.

What comes to mind when you think of that word? Probably galaxies far, far away…stars…aliens?

alien11

I want to talk about a whole different kind of space today.

Are you cluttered up inside? Do you have space?

I was meditating the other day when I asked, “What do I do to market better?” This is something that’s always on a creative artist’s mind.

As I sat there the most unusual answer came to me. “Space in yourself to manifest.”

I was baffled a bit by this answer, because of course I’m thinking I’d hear, “Work harder, post more, email lists, blah, blah.” Then I go and hear something about space? Huh?

This is the message I received:

“Space in yourself to manifest. Space in the mind is a powerful tool to manifest. Emotional distance between you and your goal hinders it. Space to create is the  most powerful. Clear out space. Clear out mind clutter, soul clutter, and old chatter. Old emotions block up the space to create. FEEL them fully. People fill their heads with noise. You want to empty the head of noise. Mind noise prevents people from actually listening. Space is formed by clearing the noise.”

smaller space for blog

Whether this was my spirit talking, Holy Spirit, or an angel, I’m unsure, but it continued with these steps:

Step 1: Noise reduction. There isn’t a “no noise” switch or solution, but there is resources for less noise. Emotional noise is a real thing in the air. Pollution of real emotions happens–but you can filter it.

Step 2: Breathing. Learn it. Do it.

Step 3: Repeat Step 4–laugh at all life. Keep it light–keep it fun. (I received step 4 before 3)

Step 4: Take these steps seriously, but also learn to see humor in all life.

This was the final piece of info I received:

Be present as much as possible. Create less noise pollution in yourself and others. Others FEED on emotional disturbances. They thrive on it. Create less “drama” for the masses to feed on. Let go of the need to feed.

 

If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe to my blog, youtube channel, instagram, or facebook  for more information about anxiety, depression, divorce healing, and spirituality. 

How can you cure depression naturally? #depression #anxiety

 

facts smaller

How do you avoid depression?

Why is there such a raging amount of people suffering from this mental illness? Is there a natural way to avoid it all together?

Yes, I believe there is.

If you’re like me, and you look at those statistics above, it breaks your heart.  My natural instinct is to want to help those who are in pain and loneliness. But, therein lies the flaw.

Love yourself

We don’t take care of ourselves first. 

I’m not saying don’t reach out to those who are need, but many times, those who are suffering from a mental illness got to that place, because they ignored emotions that were trying to get their attention. When repressed anger, continuing sadness, frustration, fear, and feeling held back swirl around on the inside of you, a deeper root manifests–depression. Depression is a state of giving up when the emotions one feels can’t be expressed or sorted through.

So, how do we avoid this all together? Let’s dig in a little further.

Depression and Divorce

My story of depression began with a fairy-tale. I’m not going to go into the mess of divorce right now, but I want to briefly give you a few insights. My story started with my desire to have children. The longer the desire was withheld from me, the longer my repressed emotions built, until I got to the place of depression.

Everyone handles depression differently.

I know for some they don’t do anything but lay on their bed, but the thing about depression is: it has a bunch of ways it comes out.

For me it was being obsessive.

I couldn’t stop long enough to try to deal with the emotions I felt about being withheld my deepest desire. I couldn’t face my feelings of “not good enough” or that my husband didn’t love me. I would ‘think’ those thoughts, but I never let myself actually express or ‘feel’ those thoughts. It was too painful.

This is why depression formed for me.

How do you deal with depression?

Depression is, in my own opinion, a lack of expression in some way. Some people get depressed cause they feel life has no meaning or point. But why? What part of themselves are they not allowing to express?

  • Depression is a form of self-loathing (it is a form of self-expression, because we aren’t expressing what we truly want or desire to ourselves or others.)
  • Depression is our emotions shutting down because it hurts too much not to speak our truth.
  • Depression is formed from desiring something, and anger, frustration, sadness, and pain grows too great to handle.
  • Depression can be triggered from a life event: divorce or loss of some kind (if emotions aren’t sorted through or expressed, it can linger after these events are long over.)

So how do you deal with it?

EXPRESS.

I found this amazing book called: the Courage to Be Creative. It literally came at the right time for me. I thought I was the only cray-cray one out there who felt the way I felt. And, that is a form of depression right there–feeling you are the only one who feels that bad.

The Courage to Creative helped me to see that I needed to funnel my emotions INTO something. Again, like I said, EXPRESSION.

We need expression to thrive. We need expression to live.  Discovering who you are, not by what you DO, but your very ESSENCE or BEING and LIVE through that. Discovering your passion prevents depression, because it gives all that emotional energy a place to go.

We all suffer. We all go through pain. And through our pain we can thrive, if we learn to funnel that expression of pain INTO something. If you are having a hard time knowing what form of expression works for you: explore everything. I’m a writer, a reader, a dreamer, and an idealist. I love to express this way, but I also love to express by crafting or being outside.

FIND YOUR EXPRESSION.

If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe to my blog, youtube channel, instagram, or facebook  for more information about anxiety, depression, divorce healing, and spirituality

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or professional. These are simply my opinions on the subject of depression. If you are suffering from a major illness, please talk to your doctor. 

Sources: http://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-By-the-Numbers